Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Provo....on drugs

This is Provo:


This is Provo on drugs:


I recently (like 20 minutes ago) discovered that the mayor of Provo writes a blog. In reading through past posts I discovered this beauty. The city of Provo will provide $25,000 of the $100,000 it will cost to install this sculpture at the future Frontrunner stop.

$100,000

Now obviously art is a matter of taste. But first of all. Why pay $100,000 for a sculpture? Wouldn't half of that buy you a pretty nice sculpture? I know that I always head straight for the clearance racks, but really, $100,000?

For this???

If I were sitting on the Frontrunner and looked out the window and saw this looming I'm pretty sure I would think, "Not getting off here. Crazytown." and then I would think "Hope they didn't pay more than $10 for that thing obviously designed and constructed by preschoolers." I'm pretty sure Will drew that exact thing yesterday.

Words of the mayor: "In my opinion, it is a worthwhile investment. I believe, under the "no broken windows" theory, that appearances matter, and attractive artwork will help deter crime. It will also likely leave visitors with a favorable impression of our city.

But what I like most about this investment is the city only has to pay 25%. Even in difficult economic times, it makes sense to take advantage of an opportunity like this."

A few points:

A. I see you use the term "investment" loosely. As in "if crazy ever takes off we might be able to sell this thing on e-bay for a small profit...and if not we'll fall back on the hope-scrap-metal-prices-go-through-the-roof plan."

B. Appearances matter.

C. Attractive artwork may very well deter crime. Expensive, ugly things encourage crime. Crazy begets crazy.

D. It will certainly leave visitors with an impression of our city...I'm not sure favorable is the word you were looking for.

E. If you think it makes sense to take advantage of this opportunity then I have a few things I would like to sell you. Like the contents of my garage. A piece of "installation art" entitled "Pile O Crap." On sale until tomorrow only for a mere $75,000. Act now. Don't miss this opportunity.

That is all.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Must have been created by a relative.

Jenny said...

$100,000 = a good laugh...I would have given them that for free

Nicole said...

Oh, boy. I don't see how anyone looked at that thing and said, "It just screams Provo."

M.M.M. said...

They should just have a sculpture of a pregnant woman in an Anthropolgie-esque dress.
I think that pretty much sums up Provo.

ottspot said...

True, cousin. But it would also have to cost way over $100,000.

Kimberlee Koplin Mills St. Clair said...

Okay...you totally make me laugh. And I would love to bring Norah down for you....I'll stop by next time I'm down that direction...I miss having you as my visiting teacher...